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Breaking News: Meteorite Strikes Site C Dam Location; Still No Bedrock Found. Satire

“Dam Cam”.  Photo showing crater just upstream from proposed axis of Site C Dam.

BC Hydro is just now releasing details of a recent meteorite strike at the Site C Dam project in northern BC near the town of Fort St. John. No official photos have been released yet, but the accompanying photo was taken from Dam Protesters Point and shows the massive crater.

“Scientist are telling us that thanks to the shale formations and lack of true bedrock at Site C, the impact of this fairly large meteorite was absorbed by the earth and surprisingly very little explosive blast was emitted as would normally be expected” a BCH spokesperson was quoted as stating. “Essentially, it behaved in the same manner as if a giant rock was thrown into thick mud.”

In addition to the favourable location for such a strike, it turns out that a rainstorm had shut down all work, and the workers had already traveled to the local casino on the ‘Site C Leisure Bus’ when the strike occurred.

“Yes, we are very fortunate that there were no casualties from the meteorite” the spokesman said. “The only worker close to the strike was a security guard, and other than being splattered in mud, he was fine.”

A worker commented on the fortunate timing. “Yeah, when we saw those beer clouds forming, we got the H*** out of there. Even without asteroids, it is not safe to be at the project when rain hits!”

Upon being told of the incident, Ken Boon from the Peace Valley Landowner Association commented: “Can you believe it? Millions of years ago a similar meteorite strike killed off the dinosaurs. Why could this have not finished off the last of the dinosaurs, which in this case is another large hydro dam on the Peace River?”

Ken Boon

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